Sunday, January 29, 2006

On To A New Week

The weekend ended in typical Portland Freelancer style. I watched my cable access show which was thrown together literally on the drive to edit it down. Of course, I added some foliage scenes from this Fall so there’d be a shot of traffic on Grand spliced in with a red tree from Mt. Tabor. Hey, it’s all art, baby.
My wife flipped over from her show during the commercials, upstairs in the living room – I spend a lot of time lurking in the basement. She had a hilarious review: “You know that part where you’re talking about the traffic lights on MLK? I just wonder about the people who go on watching. The people who say, “I can’t change the channel. I’m mesmerized by this.”” My wife can be very funny.
I went to print out my script and of course the printer ran out of ink. I don’t even flinch at times like these. I was very moved by the producer’s latest email. He has a documentary project coming out involving Peter Jackson of King Kong fame, not to mention Lord of the Rings, so the producer is in a great head space. He talked about how our karmas have become intertwined – not your typical producer talk. And not Brokeback Mountain talk either, if that’s what you’re thinking. We just became friends. He went through a stage where he seemed so remorseful about not getting a deal done, which is just crazy. We got past that and the new theory is we were just out of step with the powers that be. I’ll tell you this: I have access from God down there, and Leno had nothing to do with it. This is not a case of not getting my chance. My stuff gets rejected at the highest levels.
The key to being a freelancer is to enjoy the process. That might be all you get. I know comedians who act like they got screwed because they didn’t get a TV series or whatever. I didn’t go into this to become bitter. I’m trying to crack Hollywood like it was a safe. Uh oh. Maybe I’ve let on too much here. I play music out of artistic integrity. I write jokes partly to do good in the world, to be part of the fun side and alleviate misery. But Hollywood? Please. Let’s be real.

3 Comments:

At 1:21 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

"My wife flipped over from her show during the commercials... She had a hilarious review: “You know that part where you’re talking about the traffic lights on MLK? I just wonder about the people who go on watching. The people who say, “I can’t change the channel. I’m mesmerized by this.”"

That was me, I surfed onto the show and saw you parked on Madison (?) facing the Hawthorne Bridge. My thumb was on the channel up button of my remote, but I didn't switch for a while.

To tell you the truth, while watching your show I couldn't help thinking "how the heck did this guy sell 500 jokes to Jay Leno?" One of your ad libs was something about the rain being like 'a garden hose in a shower stall.' A garden hose in a shower stall? Who drags a garden hose into a shower? A garden hose won't screw onto a bathroom faucet, so that means you

A: hook up the hose outside
B: turn on the water
C: carry the hose inside (or throw it through a window)
D: feed the hose into the shower stall
E: undress (optional)
F: get in the shower.

Well even though you don't seem very funny, here I am at your blog. I bookmarked it and I'll probably watch your show again too- but only if you put up a blog entry on how to sell jokes to people who buy jokes.

Thanks

Signed,

Anonymous in Portland

 
At 11:01 PM, Blogger Bill McDonald said...

That show was the weakest thing ever in the history of television. I'm sorry. One time an IRS agent asked me how I got behind on my taxes. I told her, "I'm a conedy writer. Someimes I'm funny and sometimes I'm not."
Thanks for bookmarking and I will spend the rest of my blogging career trying to dispel your first impression. God, that show sucked.

 
At 1:08 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

:)

 

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