The Portland Freelancer Candidate Endorsements

I am watching a recast of “Candidates Gone Wild”, and at this point there is no drug I would not take. I have not had a drink in over 20 years but 10 more minutes of this and I would go drinking on a hunting trip with Dick Cheney.
Erik Sten is currently dressed as a magician, Diane Linn has just sung a song. Ginny what’s-her-name just did a top ten list that caused a ghostly finger to come out of my remote and mute itself. The event helps us get to know the candidates better, and it’s really working. In fact, somewhere during all this the Portland Freelancer came up with its list of endorsements. Here goes: Anyone currently holding office anywhere in Oregon should be voted out as soon as possible. Then the moment their replacements take over, a recall should begin that removes everyone else. When this is accomplished we should give serious consideration to getting some candidates who don’t suck. This has been your Portland Freelancer Political Review.