Cable Access Show Causing Oscar Consternation

Clearly, the Motion Picture Academy didn’t work this hard for a successful telecast only to run headlong into the Sunday night airing of “Born to Slack”, a Portland cable access show starring James Shibley and Bill McDonald. All week the pleading emails and frantic phone calls have been pouring in from Los Angeles: Is there anyway the schedule can be changed?
The show, filmed in Toronto for budgetary reasons, features two local Portland brain surgeons, who needed an outlet from the stress of high-stakes surgery, and turned to comedy. “Often they’d have the operating room booked for 4 or 5 hours, but the patient would die early, so we began kidding around to kill the time,” James Shibley explained. That led to one incident they still are not allowed to discuss, but it involved a Happy Face message left on a surviving patient. “The hospital lawyers weren’t in stitches about it, I can tell you that,” Bill McDonald hinted.
As part of the settlement the two doctors agreed to pursue their comedic goals elsewhere, and 210 affiliates later, they’ve become a television force.
And that brings us back to Sunday night: “If we have to go against the Born to Slack show at 10p.m. we’re dead. Why even hold the Oscars?”, a frantic Howard Morton, head of the Academy griped.
In response the producers of the “Born to Slack” show issued the following statement: “While we regret any problems this may cause, we are contractually obligated to air the “Born to Slack” show at its regular Sunday night timeslot. However, fans can still catch the Oscars and watch the rerun of our show Tuesday night at 10 on Channel 23 in Portland. Viewers across America and Canada can consult their local listings. This doesn’t have to be an “Us Instead of Them” situation. There is also a Friday show at 11 on channel 11. In fact we recommend any stoners among you, to wait the extra days till Friday when you can just remember "at 11 on 11." Thank you.”